On Makunudhoo Mass Hysteria
I have two solutions for the Makunudhoo problem: total evacuation followed by bombing the island from chartered Air Taxis with the Shahaadat and various miscellaneous incantations and spells and whatnot written on the said bombs cooked up by local mystics and other nutters. All the top Sheikhs can sign on them for added Oomph. I suggest we use the "big one" on the school, if you know what I mean.
Or we could simply bomb the island while the island folk slept fretfully in their beds and forget this ever happened.
Given the utter stupidity of Maldivian mentality, even in this day and age, I think the latter is a safer solution. Why? Because there is a real threat that Makunudhoo is fast becoming a national disaster zone. The island folks are going nuts by the dozens or they have a dozen nuts for brains. Either way, we wouldn't want to catch the nutty infection. Containment is the key here, in a nutshell.
I've said this before. Maldivians have yet to come down from the coconut trees. We're the monkeys that evolution forgot to evolve. Eight hundred years of Islamic mysticism have hardwired our brains into thinking two things: One, there are supernatural, invisible beings called jinnis. Two, they like to live in trees. Sometimes even on little bushes, perched on tiny branches, where jinni folk like to make little jinni swings. They are a merry bunch it would appear, until we Maldivians unintentionally disturb their peace which invites the wrath of their invisible wickedness. Many Maldivians have even been married to jinnis. Is that even legal? Where's the fatwa on flogging the sinner!
Yes, Maldivians live with their noses in modernity and their asses in antiquity. You can shake your head all you want but all you will hear is the rattle of the dozen nuts in your head.
With Makunudhoo, we have a unique problem that could, in theory, become a problem for the entire country. Imagine something like this happening in, say, Majeediyaa school. All it really takes is one student to fake a good fit and the jinnis will be celebrating the fourth of July in Maale saying "we love the smell of stupidity in the morning". Soon afterwards we'll have officials listening to delirious 8th graders and making national policy changes - which may include building schools on top of coconut trees - essentially keeping us where we really belong.
Oh, my head!
masmirus | May 15, 2008 8:18 AM | Reply
I think you should take some sociology, psychology, psychiaritry etc classes..would give you a better perspective about these issues.
maail | May 15, 2008 8:43 AM | Reply
Your absolutely right. This is complete and utter BS. Seems like the Jinni's are taking over eh? xD
The whole thing is a fricking mental thing. Tell a bunch of people isolated somewhere that they are going to die by some unnatural means, they are going to find a way to kill themselves or people around them. Cabin fever is it not?
nass | May 15, 2008 9:46 AM | Reply
@maail: It's the island i tell u. That tree had to be cut - it was its destiny :p Or maybe that's where Jacob is hanging around? Who knows.
Velvette | May 15, 2008 12:10 PM | Reply
I'm convinced that it's a brilliant plan a few smart girls came up with to avoid the oncoming exams.
And we all know what happened to start the Salem Witch Trials ~_~ this doesn't sound different to me...
sigh | May 15, 2008 12:15 PM | Reply
The Crucible all over again
primary0 | May 15, 2008 12:34 PM | Reply
this is probably a CIA style experiment by our government. some good weapons they must have developed here.
masmirus. I'm curious. cut me some slack and tell me what sociology, psychology and "psychiaritry" teaches about these things? if those subjects go above occam's razor i'm all ears.
Primary0,
It will take a couple of centuries before we are capable of pulling off anything even remotely as sinister as the CIA. First of all, we have to come out of the darkness and throw away the straw through which we've been looking at the world.
And that ain't gonna happen as we are taking 1 step forwards and 1 and half steps backwards.
em | May 15, 2008 4:40 PM | Reply
now i really know who owns mvblogs. your fucking pathetic asshole. shame on your parents.
MH | May 15, 2008 4:41 PM | Reply
Now now.. my friend. be careful. The Jinns might read this. Do they have access to computers?
jaa | May 15, 2008 5:16 PM | Reply
Hehe. Love the satire.
Ismail Rasheed | May 15, 2008 9:29 PM | Reply
cool posting. totally enjoyed it.
I agree this could become a problem for the entire country. We are only witnessing the tip of the iceberg - just one nut from a bunch of coconuts.
mkg | May 16, 2008 12:50 AM | Reply
Buggers are bored, someone ought to get them off the coconut trees.
Railibaas | May 16, 2008 1:30 AM | Reply
Who are WE to say the dreamers have it wrong? Carol Nemeroff and Paul Rozin point out that many magical beliefs have gained some element of scientific validity:
* Magical contagion: Germ theory has shown that we have reason to fear that something invisible and negative can be transmitted by contact. Bacteria are the new curses.
* Holographic existence: The idea that the whole is contained in each of its parts is born out by biology. Every cell in your body contains all of the DNA needed to create an entire person.
* Action at a distance: Can voodoo dolls and magic wands have an impact? Well, gravitational pull works at a distance. So do remote controls, through electromagnetic radiation.
* Mind over matter: The placebo effect is well-documented. Just thinking that an inert pill will have a medical effect on you makes it so.
* Mana: Mana is the Polynesian term for the ubiquitous concept of communicable supernatural power. There is indeed a universally applicable parcel of influence that is abstract and connects us all: money.
fehimidi | May 16, 2008 2:51 AM | Reply
^
E-V-I-D-E-N-C-E
fehimidi | May 16, 2008 3:20 AM | Reply
Mammalian evolution from reptiles: Proof for David Icke's theory. The British Royal family and the Bush admin are shapeshifting reptiles controlled by aliens.
Matter over mind: Just thinking that my amputated arm will grow on doesnt make it grow. Neither does my dick lengthen.
TV/Radio: telepathy and ESP
Virtual Reality: we're all brains in vats trapped in a Matrix-universe
platypus: so why not mermaids and unicorns
FuzenTenshi | May 21, 2008 10:06 AM | Reply
Jus the other day i was rofl after reading up an article abt the Genital Thieving Cases in Ghana and Nigeria..
I was thinkin abt how utterly ridiculous the story of the stealing went.. i was thinkin abt how easy mass hysteria could take hold of some people..
Hehe.. How true indeed..
Funny how rational thought is overcome by stupidity and mysticism..
Maldivians seriously need to get a grip.. Jinni avalun? Ever heard of Schizophrenia or Paranoia or mental illness? Jeez..
maison | June 19, 2008 10:42 PM | Reply
u dont even think when u write article ,it might be because ur 'random thoughts',u beleive or not science have proven that there is [spirits]among us,,.u better search for thise things.Child dont try to be so cool when u dont even over come ur fear.when u dont even control ur emotions.