Comment on Ravana
I'd like to have a few words with the author of this blog, on which Maldivians of all shapes and sizes and mentality have poured out their inner most and mature feelings for the entire world to see. There are certain things the author has to know about us Maldivians before he can write about us.
The kitchen knife attack on our president is nothing new. He is probably attacked with various kitchen utensils on a daily basis. These attacks usually occur in his own kitchen where a kitchen knife or spatula wielding first lady, fuming over feudal family quarrels, lunges at him. He survives these attacks simply because, unlike your president, he was well trained in the marital, sorry, martial arts at Azhar university. In fact, if you slow down the non-existent knife attack video you will see how he pushed the pimply boyscout in the way of the knife with almost sublime Matrix-style manual dexterity thereby making it look like the boy saved him. A true hero never owns up to his heroism.
And unlike your president, ours knows his own people. That's why he was armed to the teeth when he took oath some 30 years ago. He knew there will be an attack on his body. The only problem was he didn't realize it would take us indolent Maldivians 30 long years to finally pull it off. So he made a small error in his calculations, so what? We finally pulled it off, whatever the paleolithic utensil maybe.
And how dare you mock our lilliputian country and our lilliputian people! We maybe small but our thinking is big. That's why we go to your stinking country for education and medicine and spend our last dollar on foreign sex workers and alcohol. Who do you think benefits from all this? You? We may be short and tiny but our egos are tall and our wallets fat so don't you dare comment on that!
We have built this country on the backs of foreign workers from countries like yours and we will not think twice before we insult them. We are proud of our imported foreign everything, including our Islamic identity. Oh, and lucky you didn't say anything about our religion because even if we were in a hotel room in your country in the middle of some good rabbit action, we will burn you with insult for insulting our religion.
Don't you get it? We don't see irony because we are irony personified. Are you irony personified? No! You are just a foreigner, no? And you might not know this but our bark is worse than our bite. We will teach you a lesson verbally and pour our feces out on your blogs and feel damn good about it. What are you going to do? You want to take this outside? Then go alone.
We are patriotic and religious and traitorous and infidels all at the same time, you piece of Mlesna tea bag! Can you say that about your people? We talk the talk and we will walk the walk soon, one day, not now, but soon. Just you wait and see.
Mohamed Hilmy | January 13, 2008 7:54 AM
"We are patriotic and religious and traitorous and infidels all at the same time." No country on this earth can beat us to that.
You've given much better than what we got. Let's cool off now.
ali | January 13, 2008 8:09 AM
Take no notice,The gentleman is only speaking about himself here.
Samah | January 13, 2008 9:09 AM
Don't read too much into the comments.I'm sure they were well aware of the ridiculousness, irony or whatever else was about their comments and was all fun and silly stuff. Sounds juvenile?.Like they care.haha.
Dr.Freex | January 13, 2008 6:09 PM
LOl...Obinoaveyy! hehe
bulhaa | January 13, 2008 6:41 PM
lol..this is too good.
M | January 13, 2008 10:16 PM
getting a sense of sarcasm as we? :D
good point though... we are what we are and what we are not at the same time. as haamaanu wud put it, "mithaagai vaa echchakee nuvaa echchakee kobaa?"
Yes, yes. Learning from the master himself. The improbable M. Hehe. :P
Athena | January 14, 2008 11:09 AM
Hi Simon
This is probably the best article I have yet read from you. I am not sure, people really understand your sarcasm or rather who is it directed to. Otherwise, there would be more shit on blogs, but this time on yours. hehehehe
Good one. :)
kaiza shozey | January 14, 2008 11:36 AM
hmmmm, and to think we were just talking abt the knifing incident last night saying that the scout's hand was pushed in that dirction. as u say, it does seem that way in the video. and afterall, he did learn martial arts. and the part about his jacket suffering a cut thread but his skin being damaged? :S vats up with that. and what happened to the vest he was wearing underneath? even the security guard was too busy singing "saregama pa pa pa pa ni ni ni ni.."
Ismail Rasheed | January 14, 2008 11:56 PM
enjoyed reading this posting
and BTW, what happened to the fellows beard? not on tv?
fizan | January 15, 2008 5:51 PM
If only the idiots who bashed Ravana on his blog shared your sense of humor or just an understanding of what the hell plain old satire and sarcasm is...man, was I embarrassed reading some of the comments over there... gave new meaning to the concept of being mentally retarded.
The sad truth is our country is full of hypocrites (and idiots), yes, the kind that does what rabbits does best in Sri Lankan hotels, and yet have the audacity to protest when someone dares to point out the inherent irony in it all.
maldiveshealth | January 15, 2008 5:53 PM
hypocrites that we are.
David Blacker | January 18, 2008 10:36 AM
Bravo! I take it all back. It seems as if humour isn't dead in the Maldives.
Dahir | January 18, 2008 5:51 PM
I wouldn't worry about Ravana. He is a Sinhalese Christian who uses a Hindu name without considering the fact that he might be insulting Hindus. He has attacked other religious communities such as the Buddhists in Sri Lanka itself in much harsher terms than his Maldive post. He is largely a Christian bigot. Don't take him too seriously.
shaari | January 19, 2008 1:32 PM
after looking at ravana's post & the comments by sri lankans i realised sri lankans are just as hostile towards us as we're about them. yes, there's a bit of racism (or selective xenophobia shud i say?) about us towards sri lankans & bangladeshis in particular. many of us do look down upon them in general. i dont know about you since your post was only an infuriated response to a post by a srilankan who offended our nation. well, he deserves some loathing & he was asking for it!
Yes Shaari,
You are spot on! This post was ""an infuriated response to a post by a Sri Lankan who offended our nation", indeed.
That bastard!
FuzenTenshi | January 21, 2008 1:29 PM
"We are patriotic and religious and traitorous and infidels all at the same time" Hahaha... Tht line was a complete gem..
If tht doesnt name this article an "infuriated response" nuthin ever will..
Doesnt Ravana deserves all the loathin he's gettin..
For him to take that condescending tone on maldivian martyrdom is clearly outrageous.. He deserves to be rained on with dhivehi language filth that he duznt even understand the meanin of..
The full rage of the Maldivian Society in all its glory..
The hypocrite.. Tryin to downgrade our ideology jus coz our brave martyr cud not get his hands on anythin else other than a shank and got foiled by the ingenious mind trap of our great leader.. Does it not show how great our ppl are?
Jeeezz..
The stench of Hypocrisy, and of mindless drones hangs heavy on tht article...
Putrid beyond belief..
Hani Amir | January 23, 2008 12:20 AM
This is all so bloody hilarious. Especially all these clear thinkers telling you not to take this Ravana guy seriously haha.
'He deserves to be rained on with dhivehi language filth that he duznt even understand the meanin of..
The full rage of the Maldivian Society in all its glory..'
Posts like that are as funny as they are sad. People making retards of themselves are always funny, pity these retards account for most of us.
Hassan | January 24, 2008 12:55 AM
Simon, you and the crowd you mingle with doesn't count as the whole Maldivian population..Sure an atheist bigot like you is more likely to hump rabbits and goats in hotels..But don't label us all as belonging to your cadre.
FuzenTenshi | January 24, 2008 9:39 AM
Hilarious as it may seem.. It is more hilarious wen ppl take sarcasm as truth.. ;)
Dnt get your knickers in a twist.. There is much more to be serious about.. :)
Btw... Speaking of bigots.. To find real bigotry, Maldivians only need to look around themselves..